TACH IT UP! TACH IT UP! JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #388!

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TESTIFYING WITH JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #387!

SIZZLING COMBO PLATTER OF THE WEEK: John Tefteller’s Blues Images – 2014 Classic Blues Artwork Calendar including 1920’s Blues Classics Volume 11 (Blues Images) :: Brothers and Sisters, I know times are tough! Pay checks keep on getting shorter all of the time while dole queues keep on getting longer all down the line! But I’m not here to tell you something that you already know! I’m here to once again tell you that there’s a way for you to escape your worryin’ woes! I’m here to tell you that it’s time to stand up for your rights as a consumer! I’m telling you that it’s time to make the most important purchasing decision of the entire year! Namely, choosing which 2014 wall calendar you’re gonna hang in your hovel to cover that unsightly .32-20 peephole that the doxy next door “accidentally” drilled into your headboard. She says.

Now you can either be a right square who saves up his hard-earned shekels all year long, only to blow them by buying something meshugana like a transitory twelve month pictorial of bug-eyed velvet paintings—or, being hepper than hip, you can choose wisely instead and spruce up your swingin’ smack shack with the latest educational calendar and accompanying blues album, both of which have been expertly complied with an obsessively unreasonable attention to detail by none other than America’s eminent blues historian and world-class collector Mr. John Tefteller.

Tefteller, who specializes in preserving the hot 78 rpm sides that Paramount pressed in the late ’20s and early ’30s, has spent the last ten years putting his coveted collection to excellent use by restoring a heapin’ helpin’ of the thousands of priceless sides he’s acquired over the decades—many of which are so scarce that Tefteller’s got the only copy in existence—and then reissuing the remastered results every year on a bonus long player that provides the perfect aural accompaniment to each month’s advertising graphics on his annual Blues Images calendar.

And, boy howdy, what images they are! Fellow 78 collector and pioneering underground comix legend Robert Crumb ain’t whistling in Dixie when he waxes rhapsodic about the superb source material from which the visuals are derived: namely, Paramount’s profusely illustrated Race record catalogues.

Even better, every calendar page depicting sob songs of wanton wimmens and griftin’ gents is just loaded with licentious lyrics and an insightful explanatory section that puts both the artist and the song into historical context—not to mention the detailed day by day delineations which mark the secular arrivals and spiritual departures of all the blues greats.

But as enlightening as the first decade has been, Tefteller’s epochal 2014 Eleventh Anniversary Edition tops them all with an unsurpassed selection of sides that you literally can’t find anywhere else. You better listen to me ’cause I’m tellin’ you what’s being put down so you best pick up on it: at a mere twenty bucks a pop for both the big twelve inch twelve month calendar and the accompanying twenty-four track compact disc—which comes complete with full color graphics and expert annotations—you can’t afford not to ring in 2014 with two dozen deified Delta denizens including:

Washboard Walter (“She’s A Long, Tall, Disconnected Mama”); Charley Patton (“Mean Black Cat”); Mississippi Sheiks (“Crackin’ Them Things”); Blind Blake (“Miss Emma Lisa”); Henry Thomas (“Bull Doze Blues”); and my own personal favorite, Mother McCollum’s “Jesus Is My Air-O-Plane.”

And if you really can’t afford it, sell some food stamps and go here and buy it anyway; that way you’ll have something suitably salacious to spin while you’re breaking in your new headboard—like Luella Miller’s “Rattlesnake Groan”!

Be seeing you!